Although I was planning on a little break from the media, I feel I need to say something and add some details to the entire CAL cancelation statement. It almost feels scared to write down some words as it feels the whole world is watching me at the moment. So here we go.
First of all I want to say….thank you. From the deepest of my soul…thank you. In first place for understanding why my decision is made. The only thing I could do with this situation is try to make an example with it. And it did. At the moment already more then 100.000 people have read my statement and i’m glad most of you seem to fully agree with it. It is not okay if something simple like a CAL is used to ruin someones personal life. I’m also glad many of you stand against the fact that neither being a man or having a different sexuality had to make a difference being in the crochet/knitting community.
I appreciate the call to all purchase my pattern and get it on Ravelry #1. It worked, but please don’t make any costs to just being a part of this as I still don’t want this whole issue wants to be a money thing. That wasn’t the reason to start this all.
Well so far the thank you. I feel I also have to make some other things clear.
First will be the hundreds, maybe thousands of messages I receive. Of course I can only thank heaven for all the kind words you all put in those emails/comments and anything related. But please don’t expect an answer. I will not answer anything, just reading everything through.
Second, I have loads of messages regarding groups, translations, videos etc. Let me be clear about this. If you want to make a group to crochet the pattern together as you feel you can help each other, feel free to do it. But don’t expect me to join or contribute. I’ve had my share over the days and will not do this a second time. Besides that I see many names joining or hosting a group who actually were pretty rude last week in there opinion about me, so i’ll warn each of you…think before you join anything and the fun is spoiled. Besides that I want to state that although I’m not personally having a issue with new FB groups, I don’t feel it is that nice to my team who worked as hard as me on this. It is a bit like saying they failed in doing this so others stand up and will show how it must me done.
Third, another issue which comes back everytime at other designers but also in this case. Respect copyright ! People seem to think that now i canceled the CAL they can do whatever they like with the pattern. Translating, making videos of it, use it to teach your students crocheting and you’ll taking provid from it. Beware all of you, i wrote and designed the pattern and that still makes me the owner of the copyright. So notice that I don’t give permission for that.
Next will be my public appearance. The last week has teached me one lesson. Exposure yourself to the world can be one of the most dangerous things to do. It leaves marks on the soul if your being judged by many….no matter how much good is besides it. This will also mean I will start cutting off lines over the next months. I’m going back to where it started. Happy designing in my own bubble, just creating a pattern now and then. No company deals, no publications for the future, no interviews…nothing. Of course there still are some things in progress but slowly I’ll retreat in many ways. I’m done with it and want crochet and knitting become happiness again. Being the simple guy with the hook.
Last to say…don’t worry. Of course it hurts, of course it was difficult to make this decision. But I’m fine, actually I feel pretty strong. I’m glad my message is heard and if comforts me to see so many of you join me in this. But….no matter how long it takes…the Spice Market CAL will always hold a memory for me. The memory of the moment people decided to abuse my human rights. This is a dark stain on my best design ever made and it will stay. So don’t expect me to cheer for every Spice Market that will be made and shown. As long as you enjoy happiness making it…it makes me happy as well. But for me that time has passed. And one last request…when you work together on your Spice Market CAL, put all your love, kindness and your full heart in each stitch you make along the way. Only in that way we can work on a brighter future, in this community, in our world. Cause yesterday it was me saying this, tommorow it is the guy living next door…or maybe the day after it is the kid at your kids school. Thank you❤️
I think that what you have gone through is horrible and disgusting and nobody should have to deal with that. I think you are an amazing human being with such a huge heart – to have done all that you have for the crochet community and especially this CAL and pretty much have it thrown back in your face is really just disgusting. I am so sorry for how you have been treated BUT I thank you for the amazing blanket you have created. While I don’t have time to make it now, it is definitely going to get made with lots of love and kindness in every stitch and gratitude in my heart for what you have been through to create this for us. Sending so much love and huge hugs from Australia
I have your pattern to make for my son. I had no idea what you had gone through until just now. I can personally tell you I understand how cruel the world can get as I am suffering from PTSD from 20 yrs of abuse. However, you can’t let the world get you down. You have so much talent and loved ones around you. Lean on them in times of need and smile everything will be alright. We are all here for you. Time heals all wounds. Take your time and build up whatever you need to show the world your beautiful talent and self again. because you deserve it. Lots of love and good wishes for you.
your new friend DR
This is such a sad story for human kind. I was one waiting for your cal. I am so sorry that human kind is so despicable. I have a younger brother whom has crocheted all his life. He uses it for making
blankets for the horses, for new born cows who lost their mother at birth. Even out in the yard where he needs a strong rope and needs to make knots. He says crocheting is the best for farms. His
stitches hold better then a regular knot. His horses love the warmth and his little orphaned farm babies love to cuddle in it. Maybe the best customers are animals cause human kind does not seem
to appreciate the amount of work that can go into designing, writing, etc. a good afghan. Yeah for the male population that find this or any other craft relaxing and giving. There is no rule that
I have seen that says crocheting or any other craft for that matter is just a female thing. I will gladly give anyone a tour of my brothers farm. He has made a lot of mighty fine afghans for his animals.
The animals love him for it. It’s sad that human kind cannot act like the animals . Once again I can say I’m sorry I am of the human race. May you heal your wounds and come back to us few who
appreciate all you have done. If you have the talent – flaunt it.
Sent from Outlook
Dear Mark, I am with you 100% on every word. When I started designing and became “popular” I had so many people coming at me with all sorts of offers. I was flattered but ultimately it also “put me in the eyes” and that pricked my happy bubble of creating. I learned to say NO THANK YOU in very nice ways to all this attention and all the amazing offers. They say the most rewarding thing we can accomplish is to know ourselves and it seems to me, from your words, that you do know what is best for you. It’s never a bad thing to test the waters, but if the temperature does not suit you you don’t need to swim in that river no matter how many people are shouting instructions from the side. It’s your precious life, which must be protected and valued so that you can feel content. Best of everything to you as you walk your own path. xx
I’m so sorry you’re going through this shitstorm right now!
Internet once was a lovely place but as with a lot of things got corrupted in the way. It has gotten way to easy to comment on race, gender, religion, behaviour, … Something lots of people even wouldn’t dare when confronted in a face-to-face situation with an actual person!
I only got to know of your CAL today and I must say it is a really lovely design! I really hope in time you’ll get to love it again …
Sending you lots of positive vibes (from a non-English native ;-)!
I am so sorry you went through this. I fell victim to online bullying too. My heart goes out to you. I send you virtual hugs warm thoughts and light.
I found this gorgeous pattern just before the CAL was cancelled. The beauty and creativity to design something like this and share it with the world puts me in awe of your talents.
I am so sorry you have been going through such a horrible time with people attacking you personally. I know what it takes to share your work and in a way your soul and put it on display. People suck… and the internet has given trolls the anonymity to be cruel.
I love making and finding new things to make. This has been put on my list and when I showed the pictures to my daughter her jaw hit the floor at the beauty.
I understand your not responding any more and after what it seems you’ve gone through I can respect it. I know you’ll read this, at least I hope you will. When you do please know that while I won’t be making this lovely blanket right away I will be making it. On my own, and knowing the time, energy and love that went into creating and sharing it with the world.
Through this I’ve also discovered more beautiful designs that only can be created by a beautiful soul.
The close-minded bigots who abused you are small, petty people, living small, petty lives. They lash out because they are dissatisfied with their lives and know they aren’t capable of providing beauty or creativity to the world, so they give it hatred and anger.
Your design is absolutely stunning and you’re clearly a talented crafter who has given the world more beauty than these pathetic dolts ever have. Live your best life, do what fills you with joy and satisfaction, and let these people rot in their own sad hateful worlds filled with other sad, hateful people. Craft is for everyone; no matter their gender, sexuality, race, religion or cultural background. Anyone who doesn’t agree, isn’t worth your time.
Yesterday there was an item on the radio about what people share on social media. I think it was in Groningen where they read loud a lot of the terrible teksts…. It is uncredable what people share. They probably have to compensate something…
I know, It doesn’t help you, but it happens everywhere and is a real problem. I don’t understand why.
I am verry glad with you beautiful patterns you make. I love to hook and am making the Persian tiles. From the other two blankets I bought the patterns so they wil follow.
It is lovely to do. Very clearly written and beatifull pictures to help. Thank you verry much for it. Keep creating!!!
With love, Marijke Roos
I am sorry for the inhumane way you have been treated. Your pattern is lovely
I’m sorry to read about the abuse you have experienced and the stress you have suffered as a result. I really like the pattern and have bought it on Ravelry (for a very reasonable price) because I want you to be recompensed (in some small way) for the work that you have put in. I shall enjoy making your beautiful blanket and I have heard from others about how well written it is and easy to follow. I wish you all the best for your future crafting.
The pattern reads like a very good novel, making the spice market blanket feels like a vacation, choosing my own colors feels like coming to a warm and loving home.
A big thanks to you for making this.
I’m so sorry you had to go through such a shitty experience. Sometimes people are the absolute pits, and it is embarrassing to belong to the same species. I hope you are able to find happiness again in your crocheting and enjoy being with the people who make you truly happy without judgement. Plus I think it is an awesome blanket which I do hope to crochet one day.
Ik wens je toe dat je terug veel plezier vindt in het maken van mooie dingen, zonder al dit gedoe erbij! Bedankt voor alles!
I am so very sorry that this happened to you.. this world is full of cruel and mean people and unfortunately there is very little to be done about it except for what you have done and like you said when is enough, enough?! & your work is beautiful. Dont you ever forget that. And last time I checked any type of DESIGN or PATTERN made from any type of ARTIST is made the way they make it – that is truly what art is. ART is NOT about perfection. In fact did you know that the majority of art was made by accidentally making mistakes & in the end some of these are well known masterpieces today. Dont let any of them bring you down for anything. Your work says it all! Masterpiece. And who knows all those “mistakes” maybe they weren’t mistakes after all. From my heart to yours. Please never give up. I understand your decisions and stand FULLY by your side! What ever happened to appreciation and respect. Show some respect people. Remember what goes around comes around.
I don’t know what happened recently, but I recall sometime back that you were having troubles and were going to take a break from crocheting/ designing. It seemed like you were right back at it in a very short time. I remember being very surprised. Perhaps you didn’t take enough of a break. I honestly don’t understand why so much attention goes to negative people. Again I don’t know what happened here but I sincerely hope that you don’t let mean losers affect you. They’re not your family or friends or even acquaintances so who cares what they think…. even me! 😄
Crochet for yourself… for the joy of doing it.
That period had nothing to do with this. If you had read the statement about the why of this blogpost you might have understood this pretty well. No matter someone takes a break…no one can beat up against hundreds of emails breaking you down on all assets of your personal life. So they might not be family or friends, still seeing and reading these kind of things affect someone. Even if you delete a thousand messages, you’ll get the purpose of it. And no one can judge or argue in this as not many know how this is. How would you feel if someone notify you twenty times a day your a horrible person for over three weeks. I think you might break at one point.